Once again

Last night I made the executive decision to go off my birth control again. Obviously and unfortunately, I have to wait until May when my next shot is due and I will see if they can put me on something else. I have been so crazy the last two months its outrageous. It gets even harder when I try to keep it all to myself so it doesn't affect my loved ones. My short fuse no longer exists, I feel like everyone is creeping behind my back and I am just so sad for absolutely no reason at all. I mean, its spring for god's sake, I should be at the top of my game. But I just feel terribly ugly, boring, irritated and paranoid. Normally, I'm so egotistical nobody can stand to be around me. Just kidding... sort of. I just realized that there is no way in hell I can spend another 3 months feeling like this. It's possible I will go off the deep-end and nobody wants that. I didn't even get the pleasure of the weight gain I was told I would have AND I've been on my period for about a month straight(TMI). Trust me, it gets annoying after a few days let alone an entire month. I have some kind of real or imagined personal turmoil I have to deal with every single day and I am sick of it. The beginning of this year has been utterly taxing and its starting to weigh heavily on me.